Winning Some

I never did seal the grout on this table, which means it's vulnerable to stains and such. I made the tiles when I was taking pottery at the college and they each represent a part of PEI. The tree is an image of the crooked tree that hung out over our bank--it's more of a memorial now since the tree was cut down...without my consultation. That's another story.



The centre mosaic is obviously the sun and then, fish. I painted the wood ivory and then distressed it with a palm sander. The point is, I love this table. I'm proud of it. It was a lot of work but I took something that was a little rough and gave it a new meaning.

I must admit that I was actually admiring it this morning while I sat on the couch knitting and drinking coffee. My latest gossip magazine (guilty pleasure) was waiting to be read and my laptop had yet to be turned on. The happy sounds of Kieran's play narrative filled the room.



Somewhere in my happy daydream/admiration, I heard Kieran call me. I guess I wasn't prompt enough in my answer because, before I realized his intent, he marched over and dumped my coffee all over the table.



I managed to save my knitting and laptop. The magazine was ruined and the rug got stained. With the help of my little mischief-maker, the table was salvaged after a good scrub. My lovely, relaxing morning was turned upside down in an instant and I looked at my son wondering what exactly makes him tick to do such a thing. I remember thinking that it was going to be a bad day. And I wondered if my beautiful child was a sociopath. Well, not really. But I was darn mad.

Well, this is how the day ended. We all headed to the beach for a walk after supper and Kieran chased his father's shadow the whole way. It wasn't a bad day after all. And my table is just fine...even if the rug isn't.

You win some...you know the rest...

A Metaphor...

Thank you to Jackie Gardiner for taking this photo. Or should I say this visual metaphor of my relationship with my son. From day one, he's been full of surprises, many of them scary, most of them good.

Some days we're moving in different directions. We often have different goals. For instance, I want Kieran to use the potty, and he clearly can't because of his language barrier, being Spanish and all. I toil all morning making gluten-free, sugar-free chocolate chips cookies (for which the ingredients cost more than the sweater I'd love to buy) only so he can eat the first two out of the oven and shun the rest. So--as Jackie so eloquently said--Kieran enjoys the view while I slog away uphill.

Man, I love that kid. And he's lucky I do...

Natural Family Column

I am delighted to be publishing a regular column in Natural Life Magazine called "Natural Family." My article about breast cancer will appear in the upcoming winter issue. The magazine is a Canadian bi-monthly publication covering issues such as the environment, natural parenting, and life learning.

Here's the link:

http://www.naturallifemagazine.com/

Ivy Lea

What a day to be outside! It's funny. When we got the invitation to go for a walk in Ivy Lea Provincial Park, I hestitated, looking around at my crazy house. For a moment, I thought of saying we had too much to do. But, I didn't. Thank goodness. So, the house is still crazy but we had a really great day. The house will be a mess forever, but days like today are to be savoured.

how satisfying to throw rocks in the river

"Hurry up, Mom!"

"Which one should I throw?"

my boy still loves the sand...still throws it at people way too much...

my happy boys

this is sooooo Shari...quiet resolve...caring and calm...

beauty...makes me think of Mrs. Harvey, my favourite teacher

How to be a perfect mom...or a good one, at least...

There was a sign in a store the other day--you know, the ones that look tole-painted but are made in China and say things like "Today is filled with the hopes of tomorrow." While they're all lovely sentiments, I find I don't really pay attention to what they say. Well, the other day I smiled when I saw this sign. Maybe this is a common cliche, but I liked it.

There is no one way to be a perfect mother, but there are a billion ways to be a good one.

Ah-ha. That's it.

In the early days of Kieran's life, when it felt like advice flowed as freely as the breastmilk he refused to drink, I remember thinking that I really sucked. I would certainly be rotten mother. As I fought against the instincts that told me to keep trying to nurse, to let my baby sleep beside me, to answer his cries, I remember one day stopping in my tracks and realizing something that has carried me through some pretty tough parenting moments.

There are many ways to raise a child.

What works for one person, doesn't work for another. What helps one child sleep sends another into a frenzy. One baby might nurse like they've discovered the nectar of the gods, while another (like mine) will scream and arch for two weeks until he makes up his mind about the whole situation.

I'm not against getting advice. Much of the advice from other moms has helped me greatly. But, as Jackie says, it's not all or nothing.

So...I've been thinking about what makes me a good mom. How often do we truly pat ourselves on the back?

This is what I cherish in my own mothering, because these things work for our family...

I stay with my child until he falls asleep.

I count his blessings with him every night--and I try REALLY hard not to react when he says he's thankful for shopping...

I read to my son.

I try not to "teach" him things--I do things with him and hope he'll glean the skills.

I bake with him.

We go for aimless walks around the neighbourhood.

I sing to him...poor little soul.

I feed him good food.

I make sure he gets his rest.

I hug him...a lot.

We do lots of art...and I try not to take over...sigh...

I repeat his feelings to him...and I don't insist that he be happy and agreeable all the time.

I laugh with him.

Of course, the list of things that make me feel guilty is much longer. But after making this list, I feel pretty darn good that I'm doing okay. Do it now. Make a little list of the ways you're a good parent. It's important to know what we're doing right. We need something to hold onto when we get clocked in the side of the head with an airborne Lightning McQueen or accidentally drive down the road with the car door open.

Gratitude and Optimism

Gratitude

A little boy counts his blessings...

Thank you for my family.

Thank you for my cat.

Thank you for my neighbourhood.

Thank you for sleeping.

Thank you for sideways walking on the balance beam.

Optimism:

My niece won the "Optimism Award" in her Senior Kindergarten class. My brother told me this story as an example of this quality.

Briana was drawing at the kitchen table. Her intention to make a Christmas tree was thwarted when she realized she'd drawn the triangle upside down.

"Oh well, Mommy. It can be an ice cream cone now."

Aw...the glass sure is half full...

Ghost Chair

I heard Kieran chattering away in the living room this morning...

"Findley doesn't like the ghost chair."

Ghost chair?

Oh, the ghost chair.

To be three-going-on-four...

St. Lawrence Sunday

Anyone who lives in Brockville will be familiar with St. Lawrence Park. It's my favourite park in town. I can almost hear the picnickers in the 1920s, enjoying the shade of the trees and the cool of the river. We often head there for a few hours on a Sunday or even take a short visit after work. We've seen people painting, doing Tai Chi, swimming, kayaking, and driving model cars. Last year at this time, Kieran loved to run around in the gazebo.

"Kieran. Gazebo. Happy."

So we met up with our good friends, the Gardiners, and walked on over for some sunshine and a play. Then, across the field, we saw the good ol' Mulville Boys running towards us.

modes of transportation
view from the 1920s gazebo

three-year-old Zen meditation

"Mommy, come see!"

very serious truck business

Kid-Friendly Yam Fries

I bought ten pounds of yams from Clover Gardens in Soperton. I've had luck getting my young foodie to eat them in the form of "fries."

I found this recipe in my copy of ExtraVeganZa: Original Recipes from Phoenix Organic Farm by Laura Matthias. I highly reccomend both the book and the recipe (which I shortened a little).

Baked Paprika Yam Sticks

3-5 yams
2-3 tbsp olive oil
1 tsp sea salt
dashes paprika and nutmeg


Slice the yams into wedges--place in a bowl and coat with oil and spices--spread onto a cookie sheet--bake in a 350 oven for 30 minutes--bake longer for crispier fries

I just have to say that one of my best parenting discoveries has been books on tape/CD. We have signed a bunch out from the library and they provide a wonderful alternative to television. In fact, I'm writing this post in peace thanks to Curious George Goes Camping. I'm also pleased, and somewhat reluctant, to report that the Brockville Public Library has Skippyjon Jones on CD! Our caregiver said that she couldn't get the song out of her head at three in the morning the other night.

Now, Kieran approaches me, extends his arm imploringly, and exclaims, "Not your beans!"

Holy frijoles!